why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Best friends brother. Beat that.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
