I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
