life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize