JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
