I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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