I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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