Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Nicole vs. Life
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
