What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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