Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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