Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
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