oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
