check it out our google latitudes are spooning
well I can't set my house on fire every night
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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