i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy