real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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