Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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