it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
