Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(773): View more from Illinois

the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu

(773): View more from Illinois

which is why it's clearly superior

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(773): the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu (773): which is why it's clearly superior http://tfl.nu/iahv

Replies (26) Good night (3000) Bad night (701)
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(850): View more from Florida

So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.

(850): View more from Florida

I guess we all know what he was cookin.

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(850): So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines. (850): I guess we all know what he was cookin. http://tfl.nu/lvcl

Replies (15) Good night (1241) Bad night (4015)
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(847): View more from Illinois

Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party

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(847): Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party http://tfl.nu/77aw

Replies (15) Good night (6917) Bad night (742)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.

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(978): This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students. http://tfl.nu/2o57

Replies (8) Good night (2950) Bad night (1462)
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(516): View more from New York

WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE

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(516): WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE http://tfl.nu/y0z3

Replies (10) Good night (1496) Bad night (3522)
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(931): View more from Tennessee

Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....

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(931): Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me.... http://tfl.nu/xfhz

Replies (11) Good night (1620) Bad night (3716)
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(586): View more from Michigan

I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.

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(586): I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver. http://tfl.nu/zb2m

Replies (1) Good night (2150) Bad night (883)
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(602): View more from Arizona

the head trauma was worth the blowjob.

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(602): the head trauma was worth the blowjob. http://tfl.nu/e9mc

Replies (12) Good night (2353) Bad night (946)
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(310): View more from California

That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI

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(310): That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI http://tfl.nu/k5sn

Replies (14) Good night (752) Bad night (1550)
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(417): View more from Missouri

Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.

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(417): Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week. http://tfl.nu/s5do

Replies (1) Good night (671) Bad night (925)
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(416): View more from Toronto

We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.

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(416): We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there. http://tfl.nu/uram

Replies (2) Good night (1702) Bad night (642)
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score

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(608): his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score http://tfl.nu/rd1e

Replies (7) Good night (1511) Bad night (629)
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(909): View more from California

i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on

(901): View more from Tennessee

continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way

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(909): i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on (901): continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way http://tfl.nu/cwtc

Replies (1) Good night (1147) Bad night (474)
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(510): View more from California

Found an old burrito under my bed

(415): View more from California

You are a sick fuck

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(510): Found an old burrito under my bed (415): You are a sick fuck http://tfl.nu/1myp

Replies (5) Good night (592) Bad night (948)
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(520): View more from Arizona

I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game

(520): View more from Arizona

Aloha alcoholism.

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(520): I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game (520): Aloha alcoholism. http://tfl.nu/4jmi

Replies (0) Good night (726) Bad night (338)

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