We're like a lot better than the average bears
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
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