I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Randomize
