do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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