If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
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