ADVERTISEMENT

• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  i'm in his phone as sushi coochie

  Fav 30 1330 6983

  share tweet
  

• (443): View more from Maryland

  no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work

  Fav 9 807 3960

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (916): View more from California

  I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex

  Fav 10 5134 842

  share tweet
  

• (817): View more from Texas

  so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.

  Fav 30 6242 1346

  share tweet
  
• 

  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card

  Fav 19 6055 1277

  share tweet
  

• (515): View more from Iowa

  On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.

  Fav 12 7328 1571

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (618): View more from Illinois

  I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.

  Fav 4 1952 1660

  share tweet
  

• (903): View more from Texas

  We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.

  Fav 4 957 663

  share tweet
  

• (201): View more from New Jersey

  I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.

  Fav 0 1191 563

  share tweet
  
• 

  These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (870): View more from Arkansas

  Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.

  Fav 1 804 552

  share tweet
  

• (830): View more from Texas

  Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?

  (210): View more from Texas

  Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine

  (830): View more from Texas

  drunken problem solving at its finest

  Fav 2 1420 613

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (917): View more from New York City

  just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.

  Fav 4 656 497

  share tweet
  

• (254): View more from Texas

  I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar

  Fav 2 645 417

  share tweet
  

• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.

  Fav 1 574 369

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (815): View more from Illinois

  Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.

  Fav 1 402 233

  share tweet
  

Randomize