the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.