Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
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Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
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I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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