I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
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come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
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I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
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