Kiss
Puke
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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