Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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