I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
