Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Randomize
