Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes http://tfl.nu/g6v6
  Replies (19) Good night (581) Bad night (3499)
• Favorite

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (321): Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself http://tfl.nu/yztr
  Replies (19) Good night (4331) Bad night (906)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I don't wanna die...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (423): I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!! (615): I don't wanna die... http://tfl.nu/h1ht
  Replies (10) Good night (6719) Bad night (1156)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one. http://tfl.nu/fj7c
  Replies (7) Good night (8685) Bad night (928)
• Favorite

  (226): View more from Ontario

  I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (226): I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop. http://tfl.nu/0sxf
  Replies (4) Good night (3430) Bad night (1033)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl? http://tfl.nu/b3zj
  Replies (12) Good night (786) Bad night (1910)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (267): This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this. http://tfl.nu/d3gm
  Replies (6) Good night (2282) Bad night (701)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant? http://tfl.nu/aiag
  Replies (6) Good night (1042) Bad night (1618)
• Favorite

  (450): View more from Quebec

  I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (450): I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement http://tfl.nu/63m9
  Replies (1) Good night (667) Bad night (426)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that. http://tfl.nu/jp9a
  Replies (5) Good night (1085) Bad night (385)
• Favorite

  (623): View more from Arizona

  We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (623): We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year. http://tfl.nu/kva9
  Replies (2) Good night (860) Bad night (499)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb http://tfl.nu/q450
  Replies (1) Good night (629) Bad night (275)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment http://tfl.nu/bym2
  Replies (6) Good night (567) Bad night (1157)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine" http://tfl.nu/hod3
  Replies (7) Good night (747) Bad night (334)
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (434): Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night http://tfl.nu/pi3r
  Replies (2) Good night (468) Bad night (234)

Randomize