Is it normal to miss your booty call?
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
