It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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