Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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