Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
