I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
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