I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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