So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
