I cockslap morals
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
