No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
