Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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