I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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