we have officially lost it.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
soo... how was my night?
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