Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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