we have officially mastered the walk of shame
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
