So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
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CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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