Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
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