And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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