I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
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