Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
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