we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
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She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
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He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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