check it out our google latitudes are spooning
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Randomize